Kate Phillips: Not all men but still far too many

Not all men.

Three of the least helpful words known to women.

Yet, they are three of the most used words when discussing issues impacting them.

They often come up in conversations with (usually well-meaning) male acquaintances, friends, and family when issues like violence against women are discussed.

And every time they do, they diminish the conversation they’ve been inserted into by turning the focus back to men.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying it is all men.

Not all men commit sexual assault.

However, those who commit sexual assault are most often men.

Not all men abuse their partners.

However, those who abuse their partners are most often men.

Not all men send hate mail in response to articles about violence against women.

However, when The West publishes articles about domestic violence — and how we can stop it — the majority of offensive, abusive, and threatening emails received about the coverage are mostly from men.

So, it may not be all men, but it’s too many men.

Violence against women is far too prevalent in our society and it needs to change.

But to do that we need to have constructive conversations about it.

And using those conversations to point out that you’re not one of those men won’t help create that change.

Instead, we need turn it on its head.

So, how about we start saying #yesallmen instead?

Yes all men can say enough is enough.

Yes all men can have hard conversations.

And yes, all men can help create change.